King Joffrey Wants a High Five Too, Orders State Department to Amend US Passport While Senate Finall

The Senate on Thursday delivered back-to-back rebukes of King Joffrey’s (KJ) embrace of Saudi Arabia, first voting 56-41 to end U.S. participation in the Saudi-led war in Yemen and then unanimously approving a measure blaming the kingdom’s crown prince, Mohammed bin Salman bin Abdulaziz Al Saud (mBS), for the gruesome dismembering of journalist Jamal Khashoggi (which pleased KJ very much, i.e. the dismembering, not the vote).

Upon hearing the news, KJ sent word from the Red Keep to the US State Department, ordering it to amend the US passport request, long respected for its protective integrity of US citizenship, to read:

"The Secretary of State of the United States of America hereby requests all whom it may concern to permit the citizen/national of the United States named herein to pass without delay or hindrance and in case of need to give all lawful aid and protection, unless, of course, you can raise oil prices to $150 a barrel and spend billions on my hotels ... America first!"

The amendment, which was approved by King Joffrey, is intended to go into effect immediately to mitigate the withdrawal of state funds for the Saudi Kingdom.

Senators voted 56 to 41 on Thursday to support the Yemen resolution, put forward by Sens. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.) and Mike Lee (R-Utah), after seven Republicans joined all Senate Democrats to back the measure. “The current relationship with Saudi Arabia is not working for America,” said Sen. Lindsey O. Graham (R-S.C.), a Joffrey ally who, nonetheless, is a driving force behind several efforts to punish Saudi Arabia.

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